1.2.11

And here it comes again, the rollercoaster.

Before you start reading this post. I’m having a... trouble with my sleeping schedule. It’s 3.30 am here, I’m completely a mess with these black circles under my eyes, I feel like my head is gonna fly away whenever it wants now, I’m not in a good mood I can even say that I’m fucked up, over and over again, and I’ve never thought before that I’d ever make a honest writing just like the one you’ll read below. I might regret it later, but why not? :-)

“For the way you're something that I'd never choose,
but at the same time, something I don't wanna lose.”

I’ve just never been in this kind of story. It’s more complicated than I thought it would be. And the funny thing is, it’s also the sweetest page I’ve ever written in my life. I go up and down a lot than I’ve ever done. No, it’s actually not me who goes up and down, it’s actually the whole story. People keep talking about those things such as struggling, surviving, and so on. I just don’t know. I know that fighting, arguing, debating are so normal, but, should we really give everything up on them? We hold the story, don’t we? I put so much hope on this track. And I mean it.

“…a part-time lover, a full-time friend.”

I got a splash of hesitation, and it’s disturbing, seriously. I need to find out how to believe that differences will bring some more good things. Or, is it the ego, who has successfully created the bad parts on the story? We’re old enough not to play around with something like this anymore, aren’t we? I’d love to be your partner who’s always be there no matter how bad the situation is than to be a girl who you can always hang out and have fun with. I have to stop being anyone else, and so do you. Why don’t we just lay down and talk about everything, even the littlest thing?

And, for the record, did you know the thing that made me like you? It was the way you took everything easy. We lived so enjoyably. I’m sure we just need to relax a bit, trust me. This will work.