eelie meelie Lavley mo

"They don't know how long it takes, waiting for a love like this."

Being in a relationship isn't easy. But, surprisingly, being with you is what I've been waiting for all my life. It's kind of feeling when you wish forever would be so real. Why don't we try to make it real? I love you, much more than a fat kid loves cakes.

sincerely,
yours.

And here it comes again, the rollercoaster.

Before you start reading this post. I’m having a... trouble with my sleeping schedule. It’s 3.30 am here, I’m completely a mess with these black circles under my eyes, I feel like my head is gonna fly away whenever it wants now, I’m not in a good mood I can even say that I’m fucked up, over and over again, and I’ve never thought before that I’d ever make a honest writing just like the one you’ll read below. I might regret it later, but why not? :-)

“For the way you're something that I'd never choose,
but at the same time, something I don't wanna lose.”

I’ve just never been in this kind of story. It’s more complicated than I thought it would be. And the funny thing is, it’s also the sweetest page I’ve ever written in my life. I go up and down a lot than I’ve ever done. No, it’s actually not me who goes up and down, it’s actually the whole story. People keep talking about those things such as struggling, surviving, and so on. I just don’t know. I know that fighting, arguing, debating are so normal, but, should we really give everything up on them? We hold the story, don’t we? I put so much hope on this track. And I mean it.

“…a part-time lover, a full-time friend.”

I got a splash of hesitation, and it’s disturbing, seriously. I need to find out how to believe that differences will bring some more good things. Or, is it the ego, who has successfully created the bad parts on the story? We’re old enough not to play around with something like this anymore, aren’t we? I’d love to be your partner who’s always be there no matter how bad the situation is than to be a girl who you can always hang out and have fun with. I have to stop being anyone else, and so do you. Why don’t we just lay down and talk about everything, even the littlest thing?

And, for the record, did you know the thing that made me like you? It was the way you took everything easy. We lived so enjoyably. I’m sure we just need to relax a bit, trust me. This will work.

Please say hello to these people, L.

Before everything goes blue, I decide to post this now. It doesn't mean that I don't trust myself, or him, or whatsoever, but yeah.... you know what I mean.

I have just started a new story. Haven't I told ya? I don't remember when it really was, but I've given up on my summer. Well, that's the only way I should be, anyway, right? It was tragically beautiful, but unluckily, after all, I do still have a life.

'They don't know how long it takes, waiting for a love like this...'

It isn't a new story actually, not even close. I've told you about this guy before, months ago. Guess what, lots of things happened this year. And, like or not, I've changed a lot this year. I just remembered the first time I fell for him, and I feel so much younger. It's been a looong time. I don't know where to start, but, just to let you know, I'm having the best I can have. We're different at many ways, we fight a lot, but I'm tired of thinking how to make things work, just like what I always did in my old relationships. The results are always the same. Things worked out, I flied high, and fell down. The only thing that I should care about is this one thing: Are we happy with this? If it's yes, then let's just go on.

'I got tired of waiting.
Wondering if you were ever coming around.
My faith in you was fading-
When I met you on the outskirts of town.
And I said...
Romeo save me, I've been feeling so alone.
I keep waiting, for you but you never come.
Is this in my head, I don't know what to think-
He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said...
Marry me Juliet, you'll never have to be alone.
I love you, and that's all I really know.
I talked to your dad -- go pick out a white dress
It's a love story, baby just say... yes.'
(Taylor Swift - Love Story)

Let's just pray for the best :)

"that won't change a thing."

Hello.
Life has been so.....unpredictable these days. But I feel fine so far, everything is still able to be handled and I can say that I'm pretty single now :) No more stupidly wishing for the shooting stars, that heartache comes sometimes but I'm pretty sure that I'm getting my life back.

"Asking you to be back might has been a wrong choice. In the end, all I know is just, I can't trust you at all."

Those days were so hard, if I may say. I was sadly living in sadness. Passing by the roads I used to go with him months ago, those sappy love songs, those sweet memories, his promises about those awesome days ahead that I had imagined... thank God they didn't kill me. I was too fragile to let go, too in love to let go. I just couldn't believe that it really happened on me. Gah, now I'm blabbering too much.
But one day I realized, I should forgive first if I want to forget. I kept waiting for something I didn't even know and I should make a movement. I might have made a lot of big mistakes. But I can't go on with someone who's always ready to take any step and let me go.

"Be a good girl, you deserve someone better, so do I."

Probably it wasn't that we weren't meant to be together, I think that we were just not ready for forever. He was like a star that I kept staring at from my window, I kept wishing it would come to me eventho I know it wouldn't. Everything will get better in time, and I'm letting it all flow. Goodbye, that's all I can say.


500 days of summer
Summer: "I woke up one morning and I just knew."
Tom: "Knew what?"
Summer: "What I was never sure of with you."
...

You can be in love and you can be in a relationship. But they're not always the same thing.

time for my ego to talk

I don’t know why, I do still believe, there should be a way.

I wish everything would be easier.

or at least I wish I were stronger.

unintentionally found this

Carrie: “Your girl is lovely, Hubbell.”
Mr. Big: “I don’t get it.”
Carrie: “And you never did.”

- Sex & The City

ok, 638 miles may be too far. but it ain’t feel much different.

The Notebook, 2004

 

Duke: They didn't agree on much. In fact they rarely agreed on anything. They fought all the time and they challenged each other everyday...
Young Noah: [Allie and Noah are fighting] Don't push me!
[Allie pushes Noah anyway]
Duke: ...But in spite their differences, they had one important thing in common, they were crazy about each other.

everything’s still on the line

do you remember the nights// we’d stay up just laughing// smiling for hours at anything// remember the nights// we drove around// crazy, in love// do you remember the nights// we made our way dreaming// hoping of being someone big// we were so young then// we were too crazy// in love// when the lights go out// we’ll be safe and sound// we’ll take control of the world// like it’s all we have to hold on to// and we’ll be a dream////

(We The Kings ft Demi Lovato – We’ll Be A Dream)

“I never asked to fall in love. But I accidentally fell for someone who worth everything.” -@Janetdvr

i'm still breathing

i leave the gas on
walk the allies in the dark
sleep with candles burning
i leave the door unlocked
i'm weaving a rope and
running all the red lights
did i get your attention?
cause i'm sending
all the signs and
the clock is ticking
and i'll be giving
my 2 weeks

pick your favorite
shade of black
you'd best
prepare a speech
say something funny
say something sweet
but don't say
that you loved me

'cause i'm still breathing
but we've been
dead for awhile
this sickness has no cure
we're going down for sure
already lost a grip
best abandon ship

...well, at least you know.

a letter to my summer

Dear summer love,

I know it looks so cheesy but let me say something. I thank you for all the things we’ve done and undone. I can’t hide how love has brought me up and down every single day. Those days I got mad and cried over you, those days I fell deeper and deeper for you. I was no more than a girl who had fallen desperately in love. And yes, I am, still. Silly, eh? It may be too old to let the love get me down stupidly, don’t you think so? I know you do. I spent those days thinking how to get into your unreachable mind, how to make it memorable enough to be saved sweetly and irreplaceably in the box, I was all wrong. I know all we gotta do is only finding how to stay in line, expect nothing and let it all flow. Don’t mind it, as usual. Someday I’ll turn back to this page and read this, bet me, I’ll laugh loudly, over me. I won’t be able to wonder how cheesy and labile I’ve been. And I’ll curse you later. Haha, you don’t need to give any comment about this, I don’t even want to hear it from you, just warn me when forever is going to end. Yea, I love you anyway.

Sincerely, me.

Well, you might not know about this

RT @BestFilmQuotes: "If you make a girl laugh, she likes you, but if you make her cry, she loves you." -Kicking the Dog

Congrats, dude. She loves you.

Camouflage

I might have been wrong.

I tried to write the story without knowing every single word had actually been written long before I decided to start writing. This is when the word ‘much’ is lessened, and ‘long’ is shortened. I can’t keep going on. I had dreamt about everything I’d do from the very beginning. Sadly, none has happened. Call it hopeless. What I’m doing now is, trying how to go thru a day by avoiding the unexpected anger and disappointment. Problems. I keep telling myself that I’m not scared, I’m not weak. But is it normal if all of these have driven me upset? I’m sure I’ve got a wrong scene, and I can’t get out. I need to breathe, to laugh loudly, to clear everything. So what? Oh please, it’s not just a wink, it’s been pages, if  I may say. You know we don’t have to cry to show the people how fragile we have been. I’m totally stuck, help.

tell me what I should do, I don’t wanna let it go. I can’t let it go.

Over and over again

I’m so tired of the way the world works.

They conspire, trying to keep us apart.

The case I'll hardly forget

"I'll be true, I'll be useful, I'll be cavalier, I'll be yours my dear. And I'll belong to you."
(Dashboard Confessional)

Is it just me or time is really flying, not just running?
I'm enjoying every little time of these moments. Love fills, love writes every single word on this page.
I'm trying not to mind those fights, those debates, those bad feelings my heart has got.
Since, I know, someday I won't refuse to pay anything just to go back to these times; letting him holding my hands while we sit quietly in the car, shouting at him every time he pokes me, pinches me, and bites me rudely (well actually the last one is me), singing like two on-fire-rockers and laughing at each other when the radio turns into sappy love songs, staying awake at nights and having those silly night calls (talking like two tweeties and giving up at dawns), whispering stupid jokes while we're catching the movies, sending and receiving those sweet voice notes on bbm, and so on, even having those fights and debates.

you know what, dear werewolf, I'm gonna miss you a lot. and I love you anyway.
HIGH FIVE.

Carelessly in love

Falling in love with the wrong girl is totally bad isn't it? And don't you regret it? But you can't imagine how hurt it is to be the wrong girl who realises that she has fallen in love with the right guy.

You may be ready to be broken. But I'm not.

So, I ain't telling you any lie

It may be too soon to call it love,
but even Jack and Rose in 'Titanic' movie only needed 3 days
to know they were deadly in love.

When today doesn't work well, tomorrow is the only hope.

I need to meet you.

Look, and Listen

I'm not good at telling you what I feel in words.
I'm showing you in what I've done to you.
But when I say I love you,
I do really mean it.